Uggghhh just having a moment. Don't need anyone to respond, just gonna write what my brain thinks. This is my journal and unfortunately sometimes its public. I will most likely lose you in the process but again its for me to get off my chest!
Gosh darnit my weight is really dragging me down, stupid stupid stupid, its not this hard, really I have done it before WTF? Is it because I'm tired, my husbands shift sucks, I have kids, I'm lazy, chilling with Des over coffee is way better than the gym!
Being fat makes everything so uncomfortable! I don't even care to eat seriously I'm not hungry its just I feel bad if I don't go to lunch with julisa and I feel bad if I don't eat the dinner Russ cooked. I'm angry with food right now so really it needs to go away! I'M ANGRY!!!!!!! It has destroyed my inner me! Yes I'm freakin hilarious, I am a big fat hilarious person. This is my melt down people! If I am not helping myself to food I am not hungry! I would rather drink coffee or a large pop or a smoothie than eat and meal!!!!!
Ugghh the feeling afterwards is so not worth it!
Another vent, This damn weather, come on already WTF WTF WTF WTF???? Rain, snow, 80degrees. I don't get it and the swine flu (look that up in 50 years kids) seriously, SERIOUSLY, we have nothing else to talk about! What that mosquito disease is out of style now! We have a new thing to rave over!!! Stand 6 feet away from someone whom has it??!! No shit Sherlock aren't you typically away from anyone with the flu in general, WOW!
(insert crazy excuse) can you tell its that time of the month?
I don't act mean to anyone or vent to my hubby or break down and cry like I used to (pre happy pills) I am just having a VENT session with my keyboard or journal whichever!
I just want some good old gal pal time! If they rain out Friday night ball I might flip out! I have scheduled "patio time"
Another vent...why does Dalton find it necessary to destroy my down time when getting home from work...honestly I could soooooo do without the whining and clinging and fit throwing...only to find out he has a 100.5 fever tonight WTF? I'm TIRED people, I'm tired! I'm fit to be tied!
(insert crazy excuse) again I know I am relatively happy, but I also desire to fix people, make them happy, turn there life to good glamour! So after so long of laughing and building, I am entitled to a FREAK out session!! Right? Right!!!
There I just inhaled heavily and then let it out and feel somewhat better! Plus this whole anger typing thing I'm doing really helps. Poor keyboard! :( Russ can probably hear clickety clackety clack clack...
Honestly I cant wait to fall asleep, dream, wake up curl my hair, grab coffee and go to work and hope like HELL that Doc is happier tomm. I can't stand it when he is frustrated! We girls all freak out! :)
I JUST WANT NORMALITY!!! What the hell is that anyway?
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